12 August 2014

You Talk Some Amount of Shite, Phil: Madey Up McCoist Meeting Edition

By Chris Graham | Contributor

Recently, CRO pulled some of Phil MacGiollabhain’s fantasies apart in a highly amusing article. Whisper it though, the bold Phil has been at it again in an article entitled ‘Regarding Alistair’ which contains less facts than the script of a Harry Potter film. I’ve debated how best to do this but probably best we just work our way through his latest act of fiction.

His latest tale is set at Ibrox where a meeting is taking place, following the Hearts game, on the future of manager Ally McCoist….. (It isn’t).

Yes, this is rather unfortunate.

There was no meeting. The various members of the board dispersed sometime following the game and did not attend a meeting either electronically, in person, or perched on the back of the club unicorn. 

There were no items on the agenda because, well, there wasn’t a meeting.

A great number of unpleasant tasks have fallen to Ally McCoist these past few years at Rangers; he’ll survive being “hauled” into a meeting that never happened.

I think you’ll see where I’m going here but he didn’t have a great deal of explaining to do because, well, there was no meeting. 

Easdales enter stage right. It’s unfortunate that the Brothers Grimm choose a fantasy meeting as the time to make their first meaningful contribution to board conversation but there we go. Save it for a real meeting next time boys.

David Somers didn’t attend a meeting. There wasn’t one. Also, McCoist didn’t engage in any such “rant” at Darren McGregor. So the made up meeting didn’t discuss the made up confrontation.

You’d have to be a particular kind of person to use the family of Sandy Jardine to attempt to lend credence to your latest fantasy. Of course Phil is precisely that kind of person. Needless to say, since there was no confrontation, Sandy’s family were not involved.

Now this is interesting: A quote from a meeting that didn't take place.

A quote. From a meeting that didn’t take place. 

It’s a shame that David Somers isn’t quite as frisky with the lawyers as some of his “Greenock based businessmen” colleagues. But of course Phil isn’t a Rangers fan so why bother with all that pesky legal action?

As if the madey up quote wasn't bad enough now it gets really awkward. Philip Nash didn’t attend the game. Perhaps he “intervened” to end McCoist’s fantasy confrontation with McGregor electronically? A truly remarkable feat! He even found time to threaten Ally McCoist with the spectre of releasing information which was made public at the last AGM. 

Ally was then “sent away” from the meeting which never occurred and they had a big pretend rammy.  

One can only imagine how out of control things wouldn’t have got at the meeting that never happened had Philip Nash not been there to not give them an update on the financial position. I wonder which board member that wasn’t there went white (Why not rainbow coloured?) in the room in which the meeting didn’t happen. 

I feel fragile just trying to imagine how things might have turned out had a single word of Phil’s drivel been true. Actually that’s not fair. He does point out that Ally McCoist survived and indeed he did. I’d imagine if they hold another fantasy meeting he’ll survive that too. 

Now the only question to remain is, did Phil really concoct this nonsense in his own fragile head or was he fed it by another of his ‘sources’? If the latter, then he really must tell Imran or Jack to do better.